The following is written by a long time missionary and ministry leader serving in India who was blind sided by the effects of depression. Her testimony indicates how practical steps along with truth and acceptance--and tremendous effort--made a life saving difference for her. She encourages us to have a compassionate, educated, proactive approach to depression.
I didn’t know what depression was. So I couldn’t recognize it in myself. Was it spiritual warfare? Was it burn out? I really didn’t know what was happening to me
or how serious it had become.
Over a period of several years I was emotionally
overwhelmed by what my therapist calls “a perfect storm” (See blog link below). Severely draining work situations,
unresolvable conflicts with co-workers and staff, living in an emotionally
draining cultural environment, secondary trauma as I counseled and helped
victims of abuse and assisted in crisis medical evacuations…and then the most
difficult, the straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back…emotional abuse and
deeply painful passive aggressive behavior from the one closest to me.
I found myself in severe clinical depression compounded
by anxious distress. I lay on my bed and contemplated the knives in the kitchen
and where I’d need to cut myself to take my life. I walked over bridges and wondered if I
jumped if I would die. I watched trains
pass by and wondered how painful it would be to throw myself in front. I avoided balconies of tall buildings knowing
the temptation to end it all would be strong.
Thankfully, someone else recognized the signs and took
action to get me to a place I could receive help for the devastating mental
illness called Depression. Thankfully, I
had someone telling me, “it’s okay to take medication, it doesn’t mean you are
a failure as a Christ follower.” Thankfully, I had a leader who didn’t kick me out of my role and
ministry when in order to save my life and heal, I needed to be separated from
my husband for several months. I needed time and space before my emotions could
handle the strain and anxiety of working through the issues that had surfaced
in our marriage and begin to learn new skills and tools for processing those
issues more effectively.
I left the mission field in less than 24 hours. My
therapist recognized the signs of severe depression for what they were. He told
me to get on a plane immediately and get the help I needed. In truth, it was a
medical evacuation. I had no idea how
sick I was.
The simple reason is this. We as the church have failed to educate. We
have failed to train our clergy, our staff, and our leaders in this area. Though I have my Bachelor’s degree from a
Bible College and my Master’s degree from a very reputable seminary, though
I’ve attended hundreds of seminars and conferences within the mission
organization I’ve worked with for more than 20 years…not once have I heard
anyone educate us about Depression: what it is, how to recognize it, and how to
help people who are depressed. Not once. This is a massive gap in our training of Christian
leaders. Massive. Statistics say that on any given day around
10% of the American population are suffering from depression. Statistics also say that between 50-80% will
not seek medical help. (http://www.healthline.com/health/depression/statistics#3)
I wonder why. I wonder how the church can help.
Depression in America reminds me of diarrhea in India
where I’ve served for the past many years. Thousands of children die in India from this fairly simply treated
sickness. Why do they die? They die because they don’t quickly apply the
simple remedies because of their lack of education about how to treat this. Sadly, many do the exactly wrong thing. They stop drinking, so they dehydrate and
die.
Depression is a similar illness in that if it goes untreated, it can kill. It is similar because many in the Church tell us to do exactly the opposite of what we need. We are told to suck it up, be a stronger person in Christ…in essence, suppress your feelings or just get over them somehow. A strong Christian will be able to “heal themselves” by pressing in to God more. This is the church’s common wisdom on the issue of depression. This is not what people need to hear. It only adds shame and guilt to an already serious problem. It is similar to not giving water to a baby with diarrhea. It makes sense to the uneducated, but it can kill.
I almost died, I could be dead. I was at a place where my rational mind no
longer controlled my actions. Without help, without someone telling me it was
okay to get help, to take medication, it was okay to take time off from work
and ministry, eventually the suicidal thoughts would have turned into an
attempt to take my life. And, I usually accomplish what I set out to do. One person took me seriously and said, “Get
help and get it now.” It saved my life.
I don’t really know what I can do to help educate
Christian leaders. This is my simple
first attempt. Pastors, sitting in your
congregations are people suffering from depression. Now.
Today. What you say to them can
and will make a difference between ongoing suffering, possible death, or life
and healing. As with diarrhea in India,
some simple treatments are enough for many to quickly recover. Others may need greater degrees of help. But please, dear Pastor, don’t tell them that depression is somehow a sign that they are not a good Christian. Please don’t make them feel guilty for being
mentally ill. Pray for them. Yes. Maybe God will heal supernaturally. But just as you wouldn’t tell a cancer sufferer to just pray and trust
God, don’t tell someone with depression that taking medication or seeking help
from a therapist is somehow a sign of their lack of spirituality and a sign of
spiritual weakness.
It took tremendous courage for me to seek help, to face
the shame and guilt and decide that I would risk trusting someone who was
encouraging me to get the medical help I needed. I was desperate. I’m incredibly grateful to God that person
told me so strongly to seek treatment.
Please somebody, would you educate the church, pastors,
Christian leaders and missionaries, yes and even ordinary believers about how
to recognize and treat this disease called depression! Simple things like raising the depleted
seratonin levels through taking a six month course of Prozac can work wonders in
enabling people to overcome this disease.
I have to say it again. Please don’t reinforce the stigma that says you
are a weak Christian if you can’t get over depression without medication. This is a lie straight from the mouth of the
destroyer--the one who comes to kill, steal and destroy us. Other simple tools like recognizing
distortions in our thinking can turn someone in early stages of depression
around. See this website for more info on this: http://addictions.about.com/od/overcomingaddiction/tp/cognitive_distortions.htm
Many can recover fairly quickly from depression with
someone to talk to regularly, and a course of medication. Others need to be treated with more complex
therapy, drugs and yes, much prayer.
Please wake up Church and be the Body of Christ again! Recognize that treatment and medication for
depression are not “second class miracles.” Please don’t make someone who is depressed feel worse by your
condemnation of them for the illness they suffer from or for needing help. Please don’t tell them that taking medication
is a “cop out” and is what people do who don’t seek help from God first. Please don’t tell them they just need to
pray, read the Bible and worship more. Please don’t send them verses saying
they should “Rejoice in the Lord always.” This kind of response is common from Christians and Christian
leaders. Unwittingly we become
contributors to the advance of depression rather than partnering with God to
see people healed.
Instead, surround those suffering from depression with
love and encouragement. Help them
recognize the lies they are believing or the distortions in their minds. Set them free from the “shoulds” they live
under and teach them about the incredible grace of God. Reach out to them. Make a place for them to be real and honest
about what they are feeling. Recommend some good books about those who have
gone through grief or depression and experienced healing. These are things we all
can do. These are things the Body of
Christ has the responsibility to lead the way in.
My prayer is that God would enable us as His Body to be
compassionate, kind and loving toward those who suffer from depression. That He would teach us to recognize symptoms
of this life threatening, but increasingly common mental illness, and to do
what we can to partner with God in seeing His healing released. Just as it is an extension of His love when
you take a sick person to the hospital and pay for their treatment, it is no
less an act of His love, to take a severely depressed person and introduce them
to a qualified therapist or help them see a doctor.
Father God, let us rise up and be who you want us to be
as Your Body. Teach us to love, not
condemn the sick and wounded. Whether
you heal depression instantly and supernaturally through prayer, or whether you
heal through medicine and treatment, let us be those who partner with You God
to bring healing to those who are mentally ill.
Christ follower, Pastor, Leader, what will you do today
to further educate yourself about depression and how to be a help?
For more information about depression see: http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/depression/index.shtml
A Perfect Storm written by Jeff Williams
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